Letting the light in…

It’s been a while since I had time to write down my thoughts. Honestly, it’s been a while since I had time for thoughts other than “ok, what’s next?” Sometimes thinking about the next day, week, month or year holds feels overwhelming because I am barely keeping my head above water at any given moment. I’ve even hired help to clean the house. Normally I love taking time to thoroughly clean my house, but free time is sparse and I’ve decided I’d rather spend time being present with my daughter than frantically trying to clean the house, and I feel incredibly fortunate to have that little luxury.

But next to that grateful feeling lies guilt. Guilt that I can’t keep up with life. The dirty floors my daughter will soon be crawling on. The dusty furniture she’s pulling herself up on. I just wish there was enough me to keep up with everything.

Some days I struggle…hard. Parts of life exhaust me. Some days I want all of my responsibilities to melt away so I have more time with my baby. I crave more moments, minutes and memories with her. More smiles, giggles, and first experiences. Even the littlest things mean the world to me.

Each morning we walk through the house and Corrine opens the blinds and shutters. I find myself smiling watching her open each window covering and gazing outside. Watching her face as she looks at the new spring leaves, watches the recycle truck pick up our bins, or listens to the birdies in the treetops. I always tell her “you let the light in, yay!”

And that’s exactly what she does every day…she lets the light in. đź’—

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